Sunday, March 6, 2011

The flu is barftabulous!

Two out of the five family members have come down with the flu in the last week, so my mind is understandably consumed with whether or not I'm going to get it.
I'm awful when it comes to nurturing a kid with the pukes. While I don't deliver food to them as if they were serial killers in a maximum security prison, I do run and scrub my hands and arms with antibacterial soap and scalding hot water. I show my concern by scouring the toilet to give them a "clean" place to barf.
I have a fear of puking in front of others (among my other phobias). Once, I had an adverse reaction to a medication that I was taking and puked in the parking lot where I work. This was witnessed by another person who had the NERVE to ask me, "Are you alright?" Had the shoe been on the other foot, I would have walked away, not acknowledging that person's existence. After I managed to squeak, "I'm awesome! Nothing to see here!" in as chipper a voice as I could muster, I spent the next 20 minutes trying to figure out if I would have to quit my job. I wound up deciding that since I didn't recognize that person, the odds of me ever seeing her again were slim enough that I didn't have to quit. However, if that lady ever gets transferred to my department, I would probably surrender my job before I surrendered my dignity. Note to others who enter my hijacked life, if you ever see me throw up it is best to pretend that it never happened!!!!

1 comment:

  1. Alas, I have thrown up, pretty much in public, twice. Once, as Dani & Amanda can tell you, was after some likely food poisoning at a Taco Bell, but I wasn't there when the sickness hit me. Unfortunately, we were headed to some kind of traveling exhibit of insects for our zoology class in college. I managed to run to a bathroom with my hand over my mouth. Ug. The second time, was at an airport in new york and i had been puking from food poisoning all night/morning at the hotel. Had to make my flight, but ended up heaving water into a potted plant. Nothing was left in my stomach after being sick all night, so I don't think i would have killed the plant or even been noticed.
    Oh wait, just remembered a 3rd! I was at the St Jude's Hall carnival (Loretto parish picnic?) and I was on the spinning apples; I think I made it to the end of the ride and the Easters (wayne/erica) had vacated the ride.